Patience

I am tryin to be so patient and not sure how much longer I can be patient and positive. We get our hopes up and they get let down time after time and by person after person, but yet we are expected to sit and continue to be positive and upbeat through all of this. I always try to see the positive in any situation, it makes for a better let down in the end, but if it is a good ending then all is well.

We have had numerous opportunities to live all over the country and we have taken advantage of that. We have had SO much fun, moving and having the time of our lives traveling with our kids. My husband and I wanted our children to experience different people and different places with us. We have basically lived out lives backwards. Normally people wait until their kids are older to travel alone, we wanted to be able to travel with our kids and that is what we did. We have "family" but most of the time they only want to be "family" when it's convenient for them. Sickning, in my opinion. When ever anyone needs anything from us we do our best to be there for them and to do what we can and we get just the opposite in return.

At this point we are done with all of it and all of them. It's time for us to go. Living near our "families" really is like living a world away at times. Again, no one wants anything to do with us unless it benefits them in some way. We have given people plenty of chances to be in our lives and plenty of opportunityies after living in this area on and off (but steady for the last 6 years) for 16 years now. If anything bad happens to us normally we keep it to ourselves and deal with it the best way we know how. If something good happens to us, most of the time we do the same thing unless it involves us leaving the state.

At this point we want to leave and we both know that moving is the best for us emotionally and job wise. When we told our family they have never said "That's great for you and the family that you are trying to get ahead in life no matter how you can." NOTHING! We get the, long awkward silence, and the stares off into space. Then someone that we are telling usually changes the subject somehow. Really sucks that no one can be happy for us, but yet we are considered rude if we don't jump for joy and carry on the conversation for an hour about life changing experiences that happen to them.

At this point, my husband is up for a job that could do a lot of GREAT things for us. He has interviewed with 3 of the top people in this company and now we play the waiting game to see if he gets it or not. I am tryin so hard to be positive but honestly if he doesn't get this position I will literally be devastated bc I don't know how much longer I can take this screwed up place and the people in it anymore.